I’m at a terrible writer’s block, but I don’t believe it only has to do with this blog. I have a block in my life right now. I’m not motivated and I’m becoming resentful of “stuff” in my life. I don’t want to go into too much detail, but one of the problems is that I’ve reached a plateau.
Throughout the beginning of your life, you are handed education (if you’re lucky). You go to school from kindergarten through to senior year of high school. That’s 13 years in my town. Even before kindergarten, your brain is developing so quickly that everything is a new lesson to learn through social interactions and physical limitations. If you’re so blessed to go to college, you have four more years to go to class and get more learning and knowledge to soak up, all handed to you on a silver platter.
After college, you can go either to graduate school or find a job and start making money. I decided to go the route of the latter because I am not interested in grad school and never have been.
I’ve begun to discover that you need to help yourself if you want to keep learning. I guess I expected to continuously be motivated in my life and job and to always find fulfillment. But everything becomes routine after a while: marriages/relationships, jobs…just life in general.
So you need to find a way to shake it up. You. Yourself. No one else. You need to make yourself learn because it’s no longer supplied to you all the time, everyday. And when you don’t have the opportunity to learn from others, you have to unlearn what you have learned. Grow, and then grow some more.
This week has been funky for me with this blog. I have felt downtrodden and not interested in writing about Star Wars. I’ve been jealous of bloggers who live on the West Coast and get to go to tons of Cons because it means they have more material to write about. I then got really sad because the one Con I have been SO excited about this year (BSG folk + one of my favorite authors) is during my family vacation.
Yes, I’m sulking, and yes I’m pouting. But by admitting that I’m in a funk helps me move on and helps me to get out of it.
Do. Or do not. There is no try. I am not going to try to write a post that I don’t feel right now (I have been working on one, but it’s really half hearted and not flowing). I am going to write how I feel at this moment and what’s going on, even if I’m the only one who reads it. If I want to learn more, I need to make the effort to do so.
So for “do”ing – I’m going to invest myself more into Star Wars and try to learn beyond what I know. As of right now, I’m not sure if that means I’m going to read more EU books (I read a great snippet from the new book Into the Void: Dawn of the Jedi that was in the latest Insider that peaked my interest). Maybe it just means surrounding myself with more or unlearning what I have learned already. There’s always something new in this universe, and with the release of VII rapidly approaching, there’s even more fresh news to be excited about.
As for “do not” – I am not going to be complacent. Not only in my blog, but in my job and my relationship. Trying is unacceptable to a Jedi. We DO. And when you have to do something yourself, it means picking your feet back up, standing tall, and getting to work. Learning what works and what does not.
Ok. I feel more motivated.